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Our dates aren't always exciting & adventurous but what matters is that we spend quality time together.

Our dates aren’t always exciting & adventurous but what matters is that we spend quality time together.

So today is Friday which in the Davies household means date day! Every week Paul and I set aside at least one hour to do something fun together. We don’t have to spend the whole day together, but since it also our day of rest we can’t do *anything* work related. That’s not really relevant at the moment because we’re both to sick to do any university work anyway. Knowing that this is the one day we don’t have to feel guilty about not working though is a big bonus, it’s really brought back that Friday feeling we used to feel as a kids.

Today I woke up feeling awful, and I mean really awful. My arms were aching a lot and I felt completely exhausted. This isn’t really different from how I’ve been feeling for the last fortnight or so, but it just felt a bit worse this morning. As usual, I have no idea why since all I have done for the last week is rest. Anyway, my health having dictated that going out was off the cards, Paul and I agreed to revert to our secondary plan, a mug decorating date in our lounge. The plan is to get all of our duvets and pillows and make a big comfy fort to get me out of bed and then use Sharpies to decorate a mug to give to each other.

Date 1 (66)

Even though this is a slouchy, not much effort, low energy kind of date purposefully, I still want to make an effort to look nice, in the same way I would have when Paul and I first started dating. Up until recently, I would have known that doing my hair and make up was off the cards and so would have just moped about my appearance. Now, however, I have begun to develop a low energy and pain make up routine that I can do even when I have bad days like this. Since writing out the routine and taking photos would not only take a long time but a large amount of energy I’m going to make a YouTube video instead. It will be uploaded to my YouTube channel soon so make sure you check back there, or even better subscribe so you definitely won’t miss it (never miss an opportunity for a plug.

I don’t think this video is only relevant to sick people though, I don’t see why a normal, healthy person can’t check out this video and use the routine when they’ve only got 10 minutes until they need to leave for work and they look a mess. Or, for someone, I’m especially thinking of young girls, who don’t need to wear much make up.

The whole routine only takes about 5 minutes but I’ve been doing a step, resting for a while, doing another step, etc, so that by the time it’s date time I’m not exhausted. What would you know I even managed to write this blog post. I wonder if it’s something they put in bronzer…

Love Katie x

If there’s anything you’d particularly like to see either here on my blog or over at my YouTube channel, then pop a comment below. I’ve already had some great suggestions but I’m always open to new ideas. Remember, it doesn’t have to be beauty related!

I’m still working on the new layout, but I’m getting there, don’t you think?

 


I had a couple of “good” days last week so I took the opportunity to escape the confines of my bedroom and head to the shops with my little sisters, mother-in-law, and Paul (who hates shopping). It felt great to get out, especially as I managed to bag myself some beauty bargains. I have been wanting to do more beauty posts and videos both on here and over at my You Tube channel.

Beauty is more than skin deep

Since I’ve been really unwell, beauty for me has become something that has not only made me feel more beaut-iful (check the pun), but also allowed me to have a better relationship with my body. I know that sounds a little bit like the painkillers have really started to turn my brain to mush but allow me to explain. When you’re in a lot of pain and you constantly feel exhausted you begin to see your body as a prison, I know I’m not the only sick person who feels this way, but I’ve found that when I started experimenting with make up, bath bombs, lotions, etc, I began to feel happier in my skin again. The feminist side of me screams, ‘but isn’t that just the media telling you need to look a certain way?’ No, it’s different, a subtle difference I’ll admit, but there is a difference. Beauty products and routines allow me to feel human by making the most of my  body. I know that it’s not make up or body butter that makes me beautiful, but my skin does feel smooth and soft after my skin care routine. Very often, I’m in too much pain and too exhausted to do any kind of beauty routine and I’d choose being able to leave the house or spend time with people over doing my make up any day of the week, but when I can, I’ve come to love spending time looking after my body. Not to mention the fact that my body needs a lot more care than the average twenty-something year old because of my illness.

 

A new creation is born

These are thoughts that have been whirling around in my brain for sometime now but it’s only in the last couple of weeks that they’ve developed into something more. While I’ve been stuck in bed I’ve been watching a lot of make up tutorials, and beauty product reviews/hauls on You Tube, and finding new beauty blogs to read. It wasn’t long before it became glaringly obvious to me that there was a big gap amongst the huge wealth of material out there. I couldn’t find anything devoted to making sick people feel beautiful, and more importantly, I couldn’t find anything for someone with limited energy and high pain levels. With this revelation was birthed a new feature – Chronically Beautiful. I’m going to fill the gap so that anyone in a similar situation to me can have access to tutorials and reviews to fit their needs. I have loads of ideas but to give you a sneak peek, you can expect to see a big MUA make up review video soon, and posts like 5 minute make up routine, and daily skin care routine coming soon.

For now, I leave you with my first ever haul video:


 

As I’m new to this stuff, I really value feedback, so please leave any thoughts you have in the comments box below or on my You Tube channel.

Love Katie x

P.s. If you are or know of any beauty companies who would be interested in sponsoring this new venture then please contact me at the usual email address (chronicallykatieblog@gmail.com).

FASHION is a whole other ball game, but one that I intend to play so check back here soon. Don’t miss any updates by subscribing by e-mail in the box to the right of this post and to my You Tube channel.


The last week or so has not been easy. Although P is doing a little better, he is far from well. On Friday, after another week off university, he went to see our doctor. We are blessed with a great doctor who has treated us both for a few years now and has a good grasp on our situation so we usually trust her. Her diagnosis this time was exhaustion. P can’t get over his virus because his life is so busy. We’ve both made a concerted effort to cut back on our activities over the last year so there’s no option there. P does an amazing job juggling caring for me, his degree and a part time job, but sometimes even my superman needs to reach out for help. That’s where my strength lies. Although I’m still also struggling with the virus, I can organise a lot from my bed. We are lucky enough to have great friends and family to call on in our time of need.

Doesn't my boy look cute when he's sleeping?Doesn’t my boy look cute when he’s sleeping?

The next couple of weeks will be an experiment in what happens when a carer gets sick. The most important thing for the both of us though is where we draw our strength from. Although it may sound cheesy, we know that we need to rely on God to bring us through something that is too big for us. The Bible says that God is strongest in our weakness. We are believing for supernatural strength and energy to get us through to P’s graduation.

P and I would really appreciate your prayers over this period.

Love Katie x


I can’t believe Christmas is over for another year, the time has just flown by. Of course my being very beforehand meant the whole affair sort of took me off guard. I did manage to enjoy the day though, and some time with my family. I didn’t get to spend time with the friends that I wanted to unfortunately, but you can’t have everything. I am now safely back in my little flat, with Paul and my kitten Didi. It has been so long that I haven’t even been able to write to you about the little edition to our household.

A photo I took of Didi for our Round Robin letter

A photo I took of Didi for our Round Robin letter

Didi came to me the Friday before my birthday, as a surprise. Paul got her from another family who were no longer able to have her so she was already 19 weeks old. She settled in quickly though, and seems attached to me and P. She follows us all over the house, and likes to be close to one of us all the time. Didi acts crazy (and I mean crazy) part of the time, racing and racing around the room, but she’ll also happily sit in bed with me for hours on end or snuggle up for nap time. The perfect temperament for us.

Didi is black with lots of white dots and strips on her belly. The best part of her fur though is that she has little white socks. So cute. She also likes posing for pictures, and responds to her name as dutifully as a dog. My mood has improved greatly since Didi came to live with us and I don’t feel as lonely anymore, that was exactly P’s plan of course.

The three of us are spending new year’s eve together tomorrow at home. I’m still feeling very fragile health wise, and a little knocked for six after Christmas so anything high energy was off the cards, I might not even stay up until midnight. I’m not a huge fan of new year’s eve, but it seems a bit sad to do nothing so we’re planning on getting some fruity treats, doing a puzzle and watching some films. The good thing about NYE is that you feel as though you have to re-assess your life and the last year. Instead of allowing myself to be depressed by all the things I haven’t been able to do because of my illness, I am going to list all the great and wonderful things that have happened this year and thank God for them.

How are you celebrating NYE?

Love Katie x


I’m back from honeymoon! This is my first post as the newly wed Mrs Bennett-Davies. The last couple of weeks I have been on quite an emotional rollacoaster as was evident to all who saw me crying a lot of my wedding day. I have so many good things to write about and will definitely write about in due course- I am sure you are all interested in how the wedding went in particular.

What is dominating my mind at the moment though, is my nanny, who died the night before my wedding (14th September). Whether rightly or wrongly, I put this out of mind until the last couple of days, when I came out of my honeymoon bubble. I had a complex relationship with my nanny, which I wish could have been different, but that was the kind of lady she was. I don’t really know how or whether to grieve for her. I have only seen her a handful of times in the last ten or so years, and the last time I did see her we only exchanged hellos.

What I do regret is that I held her responsible for the way she treated my dad. At the time I saw it as loyalty to my dad. I never directly got involved in their relationship or even damaged our own relationship with her, but I know that in my heart I judged her. I don’t think I’ve ever said anything nice about her to Paul in the three and half years we have been together. But, when I thought about it she’s never done anything wrong to me that I can remember. I’m not saying that I agree with the way she treated my dad, but I know that it’s not my place to judge her.
So I’ll do all I can to get to her funeral on Wednesday to honour her position in my life. I wish that it wasn’t her death that brought me to this conclusion, and I hope this blog post will serve as a wake up call to any of you who need to do some forgiving.

Love Katie x


Image source: whatsfab.ca

Today has been a much better day. For one thing I’ve managed to not only get out of bed but also get dressed. P needed to go to the train station today so mum and I thought we’d use the opportunity of being in town to get some supplies for crafts which need to be done for the wedding, and also to get me a new outfit for my hen party.

 After much deliberation about whether precious saving funds should be used to buy a new dress, we (me and P) decided that since I would only get one hen party (despite what the statistics might say), that I should feel really special. And, as mum pointed out, it can be a hen party/honeymoon outfit so that made me feel like I was a little more justified in buying something. I didn’t go crazy though, mummy took me to the fashionable boutique of Tesco and I spent a whole £7 on a new dress. I did splash out on a new jacket too which boosted the total cost up to almost £30.

 Going shopping for my hen party/honeymoon outfit has made me even more excited about this weekend. I just hope that going out for a couple of hours today won’t result in being too tired to enjoy the weekend. No, you haven’t lost a couple of days, you are correct in thinking that I begin conserving energy for a big weekend three days before the event. I did so before the family wedding on the weekend too, and it still took me four days to recover.

 I really just felt so horrendous yesterday. The pain and exhaustion made me just want to sleep away the whole day. The problem was the pain was just strong enough (even with painkillers) to keep me from sleeping most of the time. I can’t articulate how much I don’t want to be that sick after my hen weekend. I feel terrible writing these things because I know there are so many spoonies out there who would love to be in my position. It sounds ungrateful to be saying these things, it’s hardly terrible that I’m going to Bath for Saturday/Sunday. Even more so, I know I am incredibly lucky to have a mum and sister who took the time to learn how to look after me so that I could go places without Paul, and even that I can get out of my house to go anywhere, let alone on a mini-holiday.

 I don’t count these blessings lightly, I am grateful for them. When I am confronted by the painful accusations and remarks of unbelievers and have days as bad as yesterday, I become even more acutely aware of just how much worse life could be. I think my mummy is so wonderful for patiently taking me shopping today. It’s no easy feat, it means giving me so much attention, and not much time to shop for yourself. I am so privileged.

 What are you thankful for today?

Love Katie x


 

Here’s me at second mummy’s house all ready for the wedding

I don’t usually post on a Sunday but I wasn’t able to post yesterday because I was at a family wedding. I’ll write more about how I managed the day soon, but for now I’d just thought I’d share the picture with you. Still in my pjs, recovering, but managed to get some weddingy things done online so the day isn’t a total loss. We’re at second mummy’s house so I don’t want to sit on the computer but enjoy sometime with my soon-to-be little sisters. Enjoy the rest of your Sunday. 

Love Katie x

 

 


You must have begun to think I’d given up on this blog. Fear not, I am still alive and writing blogs, but only at night in my mind when I can’t sleep. So much has passed since I last took out a notebook and pen to write, I think that is probably part of the reason why you have seen new posts.

P and I did successfully manage to move, and it was even worse than we had anticipated. Mainly because the sheer amount of things we have managed to accumulate is incredible. I tried to be as ruthless as possible with getting rid of un-neeeded things, but still we had so much stuff to move that it took 5 trips in my dad’s 4by4. I have since spent a lot of my bedbound mornings running a monologue debating the reasons why we have such a lot of things. I’ll spare you the whole speech, and just drill down to the foundation the reason we have so much stuff is that we spend so much time at home.

Most students keep some of their things at their term-time address, and the rest in their bedrooms at their parents house, but because we usually live in Cardiff all year round, we moved basically everything we own to our new address. Secondly, and this is probably the more accurate reason, when you have periods of time where you’re stuck indoors for days on end, you need a lot of entertainment. For example, it can be awkward for P to find time to go to the gym so he has weights and an exercise bike in the house so he can workout whenever he wants, even if I’m really sick. We don’t have an more than a normal amount of clothes, shoes, or handbags (that’s me, not Paul), but my goodness do we have a lot of books. As the kind of people who want to know everything about everything (nothing is boring to me), we have a lot of reference books (including an encyclopedia published the year of my birth), academic books for university, and classic novels (my favourite) so not the kind of books you get rid of- they’re keepers. To add to this, we have two stackers full of DVDs and more, even though we had a clear out of the DVDs we never watch! We love films, and watch at least one everyday, I’m “watching” one right now (multi-tasker), especially on my bedbound days.

What takes up most of the room though are my craft things. I am terrible at starting lots of new projects, and not finishing them. Since I forgot to bring any craft projects home with me, I begun even more new ones since I arrived back here. My mummy is really into crafting too, so she’s been throwing an abundance of new ideas at me with her collection of books and ideas diary. She’s given me free reign of her extensive resources too!

In case you haven’t caught on already, Paul and I did decide to move home for the summer to save money. One of the things I like best about being at home is going to patchwork group with my mummy and nana. I love patchwork blankets, cushions, bags, etc, and have always wanted to be able to do it. I am hoping that this will be the summer that I finally get to grips with my sewing machine and make some patchwork projects, especially while I have been allowed unlimited access to the massive stock of material my mummy and nana have.

Anyway, this post has become a garble of ramblings. Fingers crossed, I shall manage to get to my parents’ computer more often from now on. I thought that coming home would mean oodles of free time but so far I’m struggling to fit everything into my diary, not completely convinced we will save any money or I’ll get any rest if we don’t start restricting ourselves!

Love Katie x


*Today’s blog continues on from yesterday’s theme.

Persuaded P to take a photo of me today

Beau and I had a picnic at the Castle again today, which in some ways was even nicer than the one we had yesterday. I definitely felt more relaxed and even had a lie-down so we didn’t need to leave so quickly. We spent some of the time discussing ideas and plans for the summer holidays. At the moment, P hasn’t been able to find suitable work so we will probably move home to my parents house for July and parts of August and September, in order to save money. We both get pretty bored without anything to be working for or doing something. Last summer we became tourists in our own city and did all the things we’ve been meaning to do since we moved to Cardiff. I wrote a blog post about it here.

I can’t wait to hang out with this pusscat when I get home

Before our wedding (and hopefully honeymoon) we still have two and half months to fill with memories. Alongside studying for our exams, we plan to do as many free or low cost activities as we can. For example, we love camping so we’re planning to do that as much as we can, where ever we can, whatever the weather. Maybe we’ll only manage as far as the end of the garden, but I’m confident we’ll still have fun, at least it’s not in bed! We’ve got friends we’re hoping to visit, and articles, books, etc that we need to write. In fact, this may seem silly, perhaps P won’t thank me for writing this here, but we’re kind of viewing the move home as a bit of a holiday. We’ll (or should I say Paul) still be helping out with chores and be in my parent’s home but it’s away from the bed I’ve been stuck in for months, a change of scenery. Plus, it’s in the countryside so plenty of places to picnic, BBQ, and explore. And, best of all, we’ll get to spend time with our families.

I have been inspired by the new Wispa advert, which I know I shouldn’t admit. Essentially, it has very little to do with chocolate, but has the slogan

Time well mis-spent

and in one part says,

the kind of things they don’t hand medals out for, but really, really should.

These words really resonate with me. I may not be able to do anything worthy of recognition, but I can do plenty of things which should. Things like keeping the art of letter writing alive. It’s just little things really, but being ill has really made me come to appreciate the little things. As I recently replied to a commenter on this blog, yes, in one sense, we have a right to have a chip on our shoulder because of all the things we’ve had to miss out on, or we can accept that we were meant to have a different life. A different life but not a less fulfilling life.

Love Katie x

P.s. Any disabled readers have advice for traveling abroad?


For me, one of the best things about getting married is getting more family. Today P and I were blessed by a visit by Gran #2 Mummy #2, little and littler sister.

Littlest sister’s reaction to her drink turning green

My favourite part of the day was when littlest sister asked if the moon was really made of cheese. So cute. I love spending time with family, I miss people on both sides a lot. It’s part of the reason why I love Christmas, all the family comes together. I know I am lucky to have such a wonderful family, which is why it pains me so much that we don’t get to see them very often.

This especially hit home for me when mummy #2 rang a couple of weeks ago to say that one of her sisters is pregnant. I was ecstatic about the news until P pointed out that we’ll get to see the baby twice a year if we’re lucky.

P was so close to his little sisters when he lived at home, it was one of things I liked about him. He moans about them being annoying, but anyone can see he loves messing around with them. And now, they’re growing up fast and we’re missing that. I don’t want to miss all of the big things in their lives, and grow apart from them, like we are now.

As a result a lot of our lack of trips home, we haven’t gotten to know mummy #2′s partner and his daughter much. They are a big part of her and the girls lives and we want to be apart of that too. We want to be apart of the family days and film nights. It’s not like you can book that time in, it’s spontaneous.

It’s just that it’s very difficult going home. Firstly, public transport is terrible with a wheelchair. Secondly, both our families’ homes have stairs so that’s painful for me. And, Paul doesn’t respond well to not having control of his environment. It’s not that either of our parents aren’t welcoming, quite the opposite. He’s just used to running his own ship and feels uncomfortable on board someone else’s deck. That’s a poor metaphor. It’s hard to explain to someone who hasn’t had the same anxieties and depression he has. At best P can handle about a week before he starts to get ill. 

We split that week between half the time at my family’s house and half the time at Paul’s. When you factor in at least two days rest, I barely get to spend time with either family, and grandparents don’t get a look in. And then, there’s a couple of days recovery back in Cardiff. Phew, I’m feeling exhausted just writing about it. It feels like too much to ask P to go through that very often, let alone to visit aunts and uncles who live 3-4 hours away.

I’m working on trying to find ways to make going away less stressful, exhausting and painful for both of us. For example, we sleep downstairs at mummy #2′s house now, which is actually great because it means even when I’m in bed, I’m still around little sisters. My parents have offered to turn my sister’s room into a sort of day-lounge (when she’s not there obviously) for us to have some more space of our own. Maybe I’ll try to get our families into Skype.

Love Katie x



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